Interview With a Sex Coach
Recently, therapist and fertility awareness educator Julie Lipsett interviewed me as a resource for her community. I found her questions clarifying so I thought I’d share my responses here for anyone interested in learning more about me and my work.
How do you define your field/the work you do?
I guide individuals and couples to form deeper connections and have better sex. It's about helping be more embodied and embrace their sexuality, feelings, needs, desires, and boundaries so that they can experience more self-love, pleasure and intimacy.
Why might someone work with you?
Individuals often come to me because they’re:
Lacking experience sexually and in relationships, but they long to feel comfortable with their sexuality, start dating, and find a partner.
Wanting to develop their emotional intelligence and empathy, and be more vulnerable so that they can be a better partner, parent or leader.
Wanting to explore their orgasm/erection – e.g., have one for the first time, wake up their vagina so that they can experience more powerful orgasms on their own or with a partner, address the psychological roots of ED, premature ejaculation or performance anxiety.
Opening up their marriage and want support through this process, as well as feeling confident having sex with new people.
Divorced and don’t want to repeat patterns that led to an unsatisfying marriage. They want to experience more intimacy in their next relationship.
Couples often come to me because they want to:
Reignite passion and intimacy in their relationship
Improve communication around sex and emotions
Explore new things sexually
How are your offerings unique from other people in your field?
I offer experiential, somatic (body-based) sex and intimacy coaching, which means that my clients learn how to better enjoy sex and deepen intimacy by practicing in session with me versus talking about it. Sure, there is talking involved, but each session I introduce an experiential practice that we can do together to help them move toward their goals. No, I don’t have sex with my clients (this is a clothing on method), but there is so much more that goes into making sex and intimacy great! We work on sexual communication around consent, understanding and communicating boundaries, needs, feelings and desires, getting better at erotic touch, feeling less inhibited, being more embodied, and more all through practice. It’s like going to the gym, you can’t just talk about it and receive the benefits, you have to engage your body in the process to see a shift.
What do you wish everyone you worked with knew? What are some misconceptions you often run into?
That you don’t have to have a bad sex life or flailing relationship to benefit and grow from this work! The skills and awareness I help my clients develop improves not only their relationship with their partner(s) or future partners, but their relationship with themself – their body, their pleasure, their feelings. And this work is not just about improving romantic relationships, many of the intimacy skills I teach will help to improve all of your close relationships, whether with family, friends or lovers.
What are the values that drive your practice?
Connection, empathy, personal growth, pleasure
What feedback do you get from clients that you are the most proud of?
That they're feeling more accepting of their sexuality and desires, talking about sex more openly and playfully with their partner, having more AND better sex, getting stronger erections, feeling less shame about who they are sexually, and feeling more connected to and loving of the themselves.
What else should someone know about working with you?
I make talking about sex and intimacy feel easy and fun! It's scary for a lot people to open up, sexuality and intimacy touches our most tender, vulnerable places. I'm a nurturer and healer at heart. I care deeply about my clients and always bring my full self into our sessions, because this is the best way to teach/practice intimacy.
About the Author: Allie Andrews, Sex & Intimacy Coach
Whether it’s through boutique coaching, intimate groups, transformational workshops or writing, Allie helps individuals and couples have better sex and feel happier and more secure in themselves and their relationships.
Allie is a Somatica® Certified Sex and Relationship Coach, Certified Yoga Teacher and Certified Holistic Health Coach with her Masters in Education. Learn more >>
